Leadership is essential in any context. A leader, at their core, is anyone who has others following them. By this definition, every one of us is a leader to someone, in some form. In business, leadership often involves responsibility for an organization’s strategic direction. Leaders make decisions shaped by their vision, values, and the information available to them.
But what determines how effective they are?
One critical factor is their ability to listen.
Yes, listen.
Listening is how we understand the world. It’s not just about hearing; it’s about observing with our eyes, drawing from our experiences, trusting our instincts, and even tuning into the still, small voice within us.
The Timeless Wisdom of Listening
Throughout history, great leaders and thinkers have emphasized the importance of listening. Consider Jesus, Gandhi, Martin Luther King Jr., Mother Teresa, Winston Churchill, and St. Augustine—all individuals who deeply understood the value of listening.
Listening is foundational to leadership because it allows us to connect, understand, and make meaningful decisions.
But are we truly listening?
At 4 a.m., thoughts swirled in my mind as I lay awake. It was the still, small voice urging me to write, though I would have much preferred to sleep. Sometimes, listening is inconvenient. But as I put pen to paper, I was reminded of the Native American story about the two wolves:
A young boy, angry at another, approached his grandfather.
The grandfather shared:
"Inside me are two wolves. One is good, representing love, peace, and kindness. The other is full of anger, envy, and greed. These wolves fight constantly for dominance."
The boy asked, "Which wolf wins?"
The grandfather replied, "The one you feed."
This story illustrates a profound truth about listening: we choose where to focus our attention, shaping the outcomes in our lives.
Modern Challenges to Listening
Today, our attention is under siege. Emails, text messages, social media, calls, and countless notifications compete for our focus. According to experts, we face more demands on our attention now than ever before.
How, then, do we cut through the noise and stay grounded?
By honing our ability to listen—not just to others but to ourselves, our environment, and our mission. Listening is a dynamic process of receiving, processing, and reflecting.
The Science of Listening
From our first breath, we begin listening. Newborns recognize their parents’ voices from the womb, forming connections that lay the foundation for communication. Listening is hardwired into us, not just through our ears but also through our senses and instincts.
When something feels wrong, our body often alerts us before our mind can articulate it—through goosebumps, tension, or unease. Listening involves tuning into these signals, much like adjusting knobs on a radio to receive a clear signal.
As leaders, we must manage these “knobs,” deciding what to amplify and what to tune out. This conscious and unconscious filtering profoundly impacts our effectiveness.
Building Your Listening Skills
Over my years of coaching executives and leaders across industries, I’ve observed that the most successful ones excel at listening by managing the "knobs". It’s a skill that can always be improved, no matter how experienced you are.
Here’s the good news: mastering listening doesn’t require perfection, just intentional practice. Start with the listening skills you already feel comfortable with and build from there. Perhaps try to listen just a little longer than you normally would in a conversation. Or try to listen to the other person's body language more intently. See where it takes you.
Why Listening Matters
A leader’s ability to listen is the foundation for healthy decisions—both for themselves and those they lead. It’s how they remain grounded amidst chaos, aligned with their vision, and connected to their team.
So, ask yourself: How well are you listening today? What steps can you take to improve?
Because when you listen, you feed the right wolf—and that makes all the difference.
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